the plan

so this is my plan and i think it is a good plan and i am going to tell you about it because i sincerely doubt that the attention thief ever uses the internet and even if she did ever use the internet this website is very hard to find, i think, unless she also knows the secret of www.google.com which i do not see how she could.

so my plan involves three parts and i will call them facets.

the first facet of my plan is the distraction facet and i will plant a rumour in and amongst the chickens late tomorrow afternoon when the man is already out in the field and the woman is in her studio doing her art that there is a fox loose somewhere on the farm and that they better be careful and maybe a big horse like ginger could help protect them from the fox because a fox would never attack a horse because of what i like to call the disadvantage in terms of size differential.

so the second facet of my plan is the blending into the crowd part and this will be hard because i am a turkey and the chickens are chickens and in case you have never been to a farm or seen a picture of a farm turkeys and chickens do not look the same but still i am also ‘afraid’ of this ‘fox’ you see because foxes eat turkeys too so i will run around this way and that way frantically as i am assuming the chickens will do because really they are very stupid and i will run up to ginger with them and i will act just as stupid but really i will be preparing for the third facet of my plan which i will explain to you momentarily.

with ginger trying to calm down the silly chickens i will make my way behind the attention thief who is just casually looking on and wondering how she can make them stop talking about a fox and start talking about her again and then i will yell ‘a fox, a fox’ and i will jump up and grab the attention thiefs tail in my mouth and pull really hard and pull out her hairs and throw them to the ground and then i will apologize to her for panicking but i saw a fox on the other side of the barn and would she and her brave mother please go and look for me to calm down my uncalm nerves/

then they will go and i will pick up the hairs that i threw on the ground and run away and then there are no more facets to this plan but instead i will move on to my next plan and if you have been reading my weblog lately then maybe you will have a good idea of what my next plan will be but one plan at a time for now i think.

i think it is a good plan.