well hello jasmine

o ho, so guess who came to talk to yours truly today after almost two months of existing/ that is right, it was none other than the attention horse herself and i had to be very careful not to call her attention horse to her face because that is the secret name by which i call her and i only ever think it or write it out here on my weblog or on twitter so i called her jasmine.

jasmine came over to my little shack today and i could just barely hear the titter and chatter amongst the chickens and i think they were maybe expecting us to fight which is ridiculous because of what i like to call my disadvantage in terms of size differential and besides they should know me by now and they should realize that i am a thinking mans turkey and i use my mind more than any other muscle in my body when i am engaging the enemy.

‘so goebbels’ she said to me while she looked down and kicked a little at the dust ‘ i have been wanting to talk to you for some time and i want to be friends with you but, to tell you the truth i have been a little intimidated’ and then she looked at me with the look that drives the chickens and the lamb nuts and makes them cluck and baa about how cute she is but yours truly stood firmly in the dust outside my little shack.

‘i see’ i said ‘and why would i intimidate you/’ and the attention horse looked nervous and did not give me an answer right away but eventually she said what i am about to tell you she said.

‘well, it is just that you seem to be so smart and you spend a lot of time in the mans house every night and, well, you are just different from a lot of us here, but different in a good way. i guess what i am trying to say’ she added’ is that i respect you and would like to hang out with you a little bit more’

well o ho, o ho, is that not rich/ as if the attention horse does not get enough attention on this farm.

‘i see’ i said ‘ well let us take things slowly and see where we can go with this friendship you want, okay/’ i said and she seemed to smile a little bit and she said ‘okay’ and then nodded her head and wandered back towards the field.

i do not know what she is up to but you see i have this philosophy and i think it is a very good one and i will give you some advice right now by telling you that my philosophy is that a man or a woman or especially a turkey should keep their friends close and their enemies closer and you can feel free to spread the word on that philosophy, as long as you quote me as being the source and who knows maybe i will start a whole new philosophy right here from the farmyard.

so that is what i am doing now, i am keeping my friends close and my enemies closer although i do not have many of the former and i have several of the latter but today was an important step forward because now that we have broken the ice i can keep a closer eye on the attention horse and hopefully will be able to soon find out her grand master plan which i am sure she has mapped out completely and of which making friends with me is only one facet.